“Like OMG, we stole like $150 and I was going to like use my share to but like um a sweet neck-a-lace and new cellllll phone but now I’m just pissed because I had to give it back and now I have these charges and stuff and I’m pissed and like and like like like.”
You don’t believe me, see for yourself. Oh yeah and if you commit a crime, NEVER EVER confess to it infront of a news camera.
**UPDATE** The blonde haired bizatch walked out on a $28 Denny’s check a few weeks later and got sent to a juvenile lock-up facility for up to 3 years for the combined crimes. She’s actually quite attractive.
Mariah Carey recently threw out the first pitch at a Japanese baseball game, if you really want to call what you are about to see “throwing.” I think she got baseball and shotput confused. Also, look at the catchter’s face prior to the throw. He looks way too excited by the whole thing and almost creepy. Is that Joakim Noah? Or perhaps TJ Houshmanzadah?
The Green Bay Press Gazette finally released its 2008 Green Bay All-area Bowling Teams. Shout out to Tim Gallenberger as an honorable mention (I bet he’s the 2nd from the left, BALLIN!). Why am I writing about this?
This past Memorial Day, the entire staff at RickRickert.com took to Prestwick Golf Club for the first ever RickRickert.com Memorial Day Glf Outing. To call it a success would be insulting. The group teed-off at 2:30pm on what could be the worst day of Summer 2008.
On the 4th hole, we saw what could possible be one of the top 10 ugliest huge houses in Minnesota. Check out this two-toned POS. It’s the real Rick Rickert’s dream house, to bad the New Zealand Breakers don’t pay him.
Here’s a shot of theFlash, the one-time avid RickRickert.com contributor. His follow through is described by some as picturesque.
Even with the craptastic weather, the RickRickert.com crew had a great day. theFlash won the event by shooting an 86, and yours truely blow up on the back for a 90. But the amazing thing…. we shot a best-ball score of 76. Here’s the proof.
1. If sports are involved, fist bumping is always acceptable.
2. If you are wearing a suit, you may only fist bump if you are drunk. Or if you have just wrapped part of your suit around your forehead.
3. You may not fist bump under any circumstances, in a hospital. Unless Rule #1 (or Rule #2) applies.
4. Do not fist bump someone else’s misfortune, even if it helps you. Just look down, furrow your brow, and nod sternly.
5. No fist bumping between the hours of 7am and 10am. And if you’re watching sports at this time, it’s probably soccer or NASCAR, and then you should really not be fist bumping. High fives will suffice for both.
6. Do not fist bump in a meeting. Even if you are drunk.
7. Do not fist bump your children. Unless you’re drunk, then it’s OK.
8. Girls can fist bump anytime they want. And yes, guys think it’s cute.
9. Do not refuse a fist bump. If you, as a bumpee, believe the bumper is violating a rule, speak to him afterwards. Refusing his bump is not going to help anything.
10. Do not fist bump yourself.
Alright, I’m not gonna be modest about it, I’m pretty sure I nailed the perfect look in the photo below. Just look at the hooligans I’m surrounded by. First off, I don’t even want to know what doucher behind me is thinking, but whatever it is, he’s enjoying way too much….and way too close to me. Next you see the perfectly placed female head in the lower half of the frame. Nice job with the tongue sticking out. Classy. Ali…..now, she’s very excited. Is it because she’s in a picture featured on RickRickert.com? Probably not. Was it because her sister didn’t come out with her? I don’t think so. My guess is because the DJ was spinning some hot 70’s techno television theme song shit at the exact moment. Anyway, I wasn’t having it, hence the expression and psuedo middle-finger.
So the ants came back this week but in a new location. I don’t have any insect killer around the house so………I used something else. I won’t say what because I don’t need PETA coming after me. Anyway, I don’t expect to see another giant ant orgy pile on the sidewalk anytime soon.
I remember seeing stories last year about how reserved and humble Peterson is. This isn’t reserved and humble. I don’t see good things coming from this. Especially when you see this picture and the look on Zygi’s face. He looks like the dirtiest old man possible. He’s eyeing up AD like he’s going to hump his leg.
Here you see the Jaeger-LeCoultre Men’s Reverso Platinum Automatic Watch #217.64.40, for sale at Amazon.com for $52,254.97. On sale because it’s list price is $90,900. Who buys these ugly watched? Amazingly, there are 3 reviews of the watch on Amazon. Here’s my favorite review, By James D. Beyer –
“I was surprised to say the least to find an original LeCoultre here on Amazon and for the outstanding low price of 83k. I went on prime and picked up two, one to give away at my next charity event at the manor. This is one fine time piece and should be at the top of any aspiring gentleman’s wishlist. Now I’m off to beat my man servant and have intercourse with my supermodel barely-legal wife.”
Answer the following question: Did this story take place in Wisconsin or not in Wisconsin?
(From CNN.com) A driver who secured a carton of beer in his car with a seat belt but left a 5-year-old child unrestrained was fined ??? dollars, police said Tuesday.
Wayne Burnett said he was “shocked and appalled” when he pulled over the unregistered car on Friday in the town of ??????????.
The 30-can carton was strapped in between the two adults sitting in the back seat of the car. The child was also in back, on the vehicle’s floor.
“The child was sitting in the lump in the center, unrestrained,” Burnett told reporters Tuesday.
“I haven’t ever seen something like this before,” he said. “This is the first time that the beer has taken priority over a child.”
The driver was fined for driving an unregistered and uninsured vehicle, and for failing to ensure a child was wearing a seat belt.
