A fan site dedicated to the worst product from the U of M

We are two weeks away from the start of the 2009 NFL season, so I figure that it’s time for the Official RickRickert.com NFL Preview.  During the season I do a Survivor Pool, Picks Pool (pick each time that will win and rank them 1-16), and some sports betting.  After listening to last weeks BS Report with Aaron Schatz of Football Outsiders, I decided to purchase the Football Outsiders Almanac for the 2009 season.  What an a great read, highly recommended for any football fan that knows how to read, so there won’t be many Packer fans buying it.  As long as professional football is a relevant sport in the US, I will plan continue to purchase it.  Here’s what I’m looking for this season:

So I’m looking for the San Diego v Philladelphia Super Bowl in 2009.  New England has the easiest schedule in the NFL again this season, so it won’t be difficult for them to pump out a great record, but that won’t help them in the playoffs.  To win it all this year….. wow, I don’t know.  I really don’t like San Diego or Norv Turner, so I really don’t want to pick them.  I didn’t even want to pick them but I don’t know who else to pick.  Pittsburgh again?  Can Indy really do it with a new coach??    On the opposited side, I think it all depends on how Favre clicks with Vikings offense.  Everybody already knows the the Vikings defense is the best in the NFC, maybe best in the league, and that Adrian Peterson is the best running back, but will we having a passing game?  Can we play outdoors in November and December?  Could we secure home-field throughout the playoffs?  Can Favre play more than 12 games?  That’s why I need to go with a team with a proven QB like Donovan McNabb.

Preseason bets that I’m looking at right now:
Regular Season Wins:
Arizona Under 8.5
Buffalo Under 7.5
Chicago Over 8.5
Denver Under 7
Green Bay Under 9
Indianapolis Over 10
Jacksonville Over 8
Miami Under 7
Philadelphia Over 9.5
San Diego Over 9.5
San Francisco Under 7
Seattle Over 8

What do you get when you have 2 weeks off from school, plus a 4 day work week, plus 5 days off from work? An end of the summer mixtape from DJ Chowda. Check back in a week or so for the full album….she’s 40% done right now.  The remaining 60% is coming up with the title.

The new standings look like this:

2009 Death Pool Standings

83 Pts – SeifBALLZ
34 Pts – Rickety Rickert
0 Pts – Lil Chelsey
0 Pts – Amir
0 Pts – Big Pun
0 Pts – Big JoE

Does anyone else find it slightly odd that Mt Dew introduced a new purple colored flavor within weeks of Brett Favre signing with the Vikings!? I hope the conspiracy theorists look into this. Anyway, we have another ingredient for Brad Farve’s. Drink up!

After reading an article last week stating that low-fat dairy foods are not an healthier for you than full-fat dairy products, I decided to switch back to 2% milk.  My family made the transition from 2% to 1% during my high school years, so probably 10 years ago.  Today, while G-shopping, I picked up my first gallon of 2% milk and tonight I had my first drink of the delicious goodness.  I’m sure my milk drinking habits will lead to cancer eventually, but what doesn’t.

So, what kind of milk do you drink?

These are some pretty funny titles.

Since Brett Favre, the most hated man by Wisconsitedouchers, is no longer a Packer, it’s only right that the original Brad Favre must also be retired.  So, good-bye Mountain Dew and Vodka.  You took us on a good ride.

So that brings us to the unveiling of the NEW BRAD FAVRE.  Put on your seatbelts and grab your helmets kids, this is going to get exciting.

1. Start with Purple colored vodka.  This will be the toughest ingredient to find, most bars won’t have it, but bars that specialize in Grape Ape shots should keep plenty of it stocked.

2. Choose your mixer.  It could be tonic water,  soda, or even Mountain Dew.  This is where you can customize to please your palate.

3. Again, you’ll need to find your favorite pain killer, whether that be Codeine or Vicodin.  Crush it up and mix it in.

4. Next we need to sweeten it up a little.  Find yourself a Packer fan and funnel some of his/her tears into a cup.  These are essential to a proper Brad Favre.  You’ll want at least 1 tablespoon of authentic Packer fan tears.  This should not be a problem since the whole Brett Favre saga turned them all into crying little girls, like the kid below but in Packer’s gear.

5. Mix

***Updated Steps

6. Tell the bartender you changed your mind and actually don’t want it anymore

7. After the bartender throws the drink away, tell her/him that you changed your mind again and want the drink again.

8. Repeat steps 1-7 as needed. Eventually enjoy, maybe.

So, if Favre signs with the Vikes like all reports are pointing to, then I would have lost a bet. The wager in that bet was that I must open a new website dedicated to Brett Favre, but I need to perfect the name.

www.WranglerBuddies.com
www.Wranglers4Me.com
www.MyWranglers.com
www.TheFavre.com
www.FavreInWranglers.com

Let me know what you think…….Thank you

I didn’t finish writing this but it’s Friday and it needs to get posted….

Yours truely walked around Hazeltine for Tuesday’s PGA Championship practice round.  This was my first time at Hazeltine, but I’ve been to golf events before (GMO, LPGA US Open, and the PGA Championship at Whistling Straits).  Going into the event there were a few things / people that I had hoped to see.

1) DJ Trahan – He’s a running joke at work, we think that he has dj gigs in the major cities on Friday and Saturday nights after he misses the cut.

2) Corey Pavin – All day I was mocking Corey’s height as well as other golfer’s heights (they’re all tiny).  I began saying that Corey is 5′5″ and it shortly became 4′7″.  Turns out he’s 5′9″.  Corey was sponsered by Global Crossing back when Global Crossing still existed, they went bankrupt during the accounting scandal years.

3) Sergio Garcia – I pick Sergio in our work pool for every freakin major.  Though he doesn’t win, he typically places quite well.  And I’m just hoping that for 4 days he gets his putting down and wins a major.

Alright, so not your typical list of golfers to see, but I could really care less about Tiger, Phil and whoever golfs.  First off, the course looks good, what is surprising about it is that it looks like a golf course.  There’s nothing spectacular or overwhelming about the place, the average golfer could go out there and not feel intimidated.  That is unless they play it at the yardages the pros are playing.  600+ yard par 5’s and a 250 yard par 3, jeesh.  We were standing behind the 250 yard par 3 and could overhear Pat Perez saying “there’s no way I’m hitting a 3-wood on a par 3″ and that was after he hit two 5-woods into the bunker in front of the green.  That’s going to be a fun hole to watch.  Here’s Ian Poulter attacking the 250 yards.

Shortly after leaving our great spot on the par 3, we found Segio’s group of himself, Retief Goosen, and Gonzalo Fernandez-Castano.  Sergio is shorter than I thought he’d be.  But he was joking around and having a good time, I didn’t expect that.

The highlight of the day came on hole #8 when Retief Goosen’s second practice shot from the tee found the bottom of the cup.  I’d never seen a hole-in-one in person, so it was pretty amazing, but he acted like it was no big deal.

It’s going to be a great tournament, here are my picks for the golf pool we do at work:
Tiger Woods, Segio Garcia, Retief Goosen, Hunter Mahan, Gonzalo Fernandez-Castano, Soren Hansen, Andres Romero, Anders Hansen.

We did see Tiger though.

There’s been a number of celebrity deaths over the past couple months and we’ve seen some action in this years death pool.  The current standings look like this:

2009 Death Pool Standings

50 Pts – SeifBALLZ
6 Pts – Rickety Rickert
0 Pts – Lil Chelsey
0 Pts – Amir
0 Pts – Big Pun
0 Pts – Big JoE

Seifballz’s 50 points are made up of Farrah Fawcett (38) and Eunice Kennedy Shriver (whoever she is) (12).  My 6 points come from the Wizard of Waukesha, Les Paul.  We have 3 and half months to go and there are still a number of celebrities living strong.  Who’s next??  Swayze? Kennedy? Castro? Nate Dogg? Verne Troyer?

Meet Jeff Cirillo, he played 13 seasons in the majors and ended with a very respectable .296 career batting average, 112 homeruns, and 727 RBIs.  What you don’t know about Jeff Cirillo is that he will respond to text messages within 5 minutes no matter the day or time.  So we got drunk last night (a Monday) and this is the text conversation that occured with Jeff Cirillo (see a previous entry from last year regarding how I obtained Jeff Cirillo’s phone number).  And keep in mind that the first text was sent at 1:26am….the last at 2:22am.

Me: Wang challenge.  BWs, chanhassen tomorrow. Show up. Hitt v Big Pun.
Cirillo: Who? What?
Me: Hittman and the big punr. Wang challenge. Blazin’.Boom boom pow.craig counsel press secretary
Cirillo: Shogger?
Me: No not shogger, blazon. we’ll pick you up at 630
Cirillo: I’ve got my kids big guy
Me: Kids gotta eat. All kids eat wangs
Cirillo: I don’t think so
Me: You’re right. See ya at 6:30.  Counsel for press secretary.

With 2:29 on the PTI countown clock, you see an attractive young man in a purple polo shirt above Stewart Cink’s shoulder (his left, so the right side of the screen).   That’s me.  Here’s the picture I took of Stewart before the interview.

Awhile back I wrote about how I really dislike the word ’swagger’.  And since then, every other rap song has the word in the title or somewhere in the song.  Swagger like us, check my swag, I’m onmy swag $hit, I just swagged my swag all over your swag, etc.  This next word I’ve disliked for a long time, I’m not sure if it’s been a year, but it’s definitely irked me for more than the last 6 months.

BESTIES

Girls need to stop saying besties, especially women over the age of 20.  The word puts images in my head of American Eagle hoodies, Hollister clothing, braces, texting messaging, and annoying high school girls who speak really loud so that everyone hears how awesome their life is.  “OMG I’m going to layout on the beach today with my besties, giggle giggle ha ha OMG LOLZ!”  Worst yet is when people write the word ‘besties’ on Faceworld.  I always misread it as ‘beasties,’ which is 100x more entertaining, because then I think of 250+ pounders wearing leather motorcycle vests and eating 3 pound drum sticks at a renaissance fair.

PLEASE STOP USING THE WORD BESTIES!

Thank you.

How Sexy Is This?!  I can not wait until fall.